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• The rise of the text sick note, and the email rent avoidance excuse.
• The best laid plans of Mice and Men - and slugs named Nigel
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• The story so far

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Reality Bites

By Hapless Investor

I have a friend who is applying to be on a reality TV show and so for the last week or so we've been trying to analyse what should go in her application. How do you sell yourself so that you seem attractive but not desperate, interesting but not weird? Had you met my friend you would know what a challenge that is.

But we can all be foiled and fooled by application processes. Whilst we were still negotiating the purchase of the flats it became necessary to advertise for new tenants. Although the flats were still owned by the previous owner he wanted us involved in the selection process of the new tenants as soon they would be ours. An ad was put in the paper and we arranged the Saturday as a day for viewings and interviews.

About 12 groups of people responded to the ad in the paper. But in the same way as my friend and her reality TV show some had applied without really knowing what they were letting themselves in for (It's on the wrong side of town, we need parking etc), then there were those who felt didn't match our needs (we can't afford a deposit or funds in a advance) and then there were the finalists. The people who could potentially be our stars.

In the end we chose a couple with two young children and another very clearly on the way. They seemed to be able to afford the rent and their reason for moving in rang true in a lovely moralistic way (they were moving because they didn't want to fall in with a bad crowd that lived in their previous town), and although they were on housing benefit the man was going on training courses to become a forklift driver and the woman was very clued up and together, she asked all the right questions, had all her references, and the kids were adorable.

They moved in and everything seemed to be great.

Then the cracks started to appear. Following the birth of the baby the council required a Change of Circumstance as now there were 5 people living in the flat, not just 4, and as such there was a break in the payments. The tenant asked the previous owner to use the deposit as that month's payment.

At the point when we took over the ownership of the flat the deposit had been used and the tenant was still a month behind in the rent but the Change of Circumstance was due to be completed at any moment.

Then things changed.

Post partum depression is a horrible thing. It robs a mother of what should be some of the happiest moments of her life. It clouds your judgement and affects your whole world. But for some it is more extreme than others. And with our tenant it was extreme.

Whilst (we shall call him Adam) Adam was at the shop buying milk Eve collected all his things and threw them out. She refused to let him back in the flat and a protracted argument ensued. Upset by the argument, her post partum depression and rumours of his philandering, she locked herself in the bathroom with the two older children and took a large number of pills.

When Adam came back after "cooling off" he heard the children crying, entered the flat and after finding Eve in the bathroom, he called an ambulance.

Eve was held in the hospital under protective custody but when it came to moving back into the flat with her family she revealed a shocking accusation against her partner. She said she could not move back with Adam as he was interfering sexually with her children.

Child protective services removed the children from the property and placed Eve and the children in a women only safe house.

Adam was distraught and strongly denied any wrong doing. He said it was not his partner talking: it was the depression, and that they had been through the exact same thing following the birth of their middle child. He instructed a solicitor and set about getting his family back together.

Following an investigation Adam regained custody of his eldest child and was put in a mediation program to try and restore his family.

Months had passed during all of this and through all of the ups and downs Adam had kept us and the council informed. Unfortunately, and it seemed churlish in comparison, we were now owed thousands of pounds in unpaid rent. During this time we had tried being as supportive as possible but ultimately we are not a charity and we couldn't afford it to go on any longer. We were paying the mortgage from our savings, overdrafts and then as time went on and the money ran out, credit cards. I spoke with Adam and he said that he had been on at the council and he was trying to get an emergency loan from his mother just to tide us over until the council had finished processing the variety of Change of Circumstances that had happened here.

Temporarily relieved, we agreed to give him the week's breathing space that he'd requested. But then the communication stopped. Adam stopped answering his phone, Eve didn't answer hers. Knocking on the door led to nought and notes posted through the letterbox went unanswered.

I went to the council and asked if there was anything that could be done to expedite the payments. Was there anything I could provide that would help them help us by ensuring Adam got his payments?

No, apparently there wasn't.

Mainly because they had never missed a payment. Adam had been paid in full and on time every month. He just hadn't felt the need to pass any money onto us.

But if reality TV has taught us nothing it's that truth is a malleable thing. And as John Lennon said, reality leaves a lot to the imagination.

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