Today in the UK is a Bank Holiday Monday, which means that it is the perfect day to put aside the day job and get on with the real work: house-hunting.
Whether you are listing your own or tracking down your next dream move, the world of house-hunting can be long, arduous task – but every now and then, a property listing comes along that makes your day. Not because it’s perfect, but precisely the opposite: because its terrible photos are a reminder of just how bad property adverts can get.
Whether it’s poor positioning on the part of the estate agent, an embarrassing expose of one of the home’s worst flaws, or just a good idea gone horribly wrong, here are seven examples of how not to market your home.
1. Bride of Chucky
“I’ve got a great idea: why not put our family doll in each photo? That will give the listing a cute edge.”
“Well, it is the scariest doll known to man. But what could possibly go wrong?”
That was, we presume, the conversation that took place when photographing this $1.175 million home in Hermosa Beach, California.
2. Revenge of the Bride of Chucky
Despite the presumably good intentions, the effect only gets scarier with each photo.
But buyers were clearly not deterred, as the property did sell successfully.
3. If You Don’t Have Photoshop…
Touching pictures up with Photoshop is relatively commonplace in almost every field – and often essential, if your listing photo has been taken in bad lighting conditions. But what do you when Photoshop isn’t available?
Pro tip: Don’t use Microsoft Paint. That is what appears to have happened to this four-bedroom home in Houston, Texas, which was advertised “as is” – a phrase that has never been more unnerving.
4. What Does the Fox Say?
Colston Lodge stands within extensive grounds in Moor Lane, Burley. A four-bedroom, detached house, the Wharfedale estate has a private driveway leading to a large double garage and additional off-road parking. The grounds include a formal garden area, an extensive lawn and natural woodland with pond, all of which enjoy a high degree of privacy, according to its Rightmove listing. Just the thing for when you’re spending your Friday night in the living room hanging out with a six-foot stuffed fox.
5. Paranormal Activity?
When estate agents say there has been a lot of “activity” around your house, this is not the kind they mean.
6. In-Room Entertainment
Everybody loves a living room that comes with a built-in entertainment syste – oh.
7. Big Brother Is Watching
Security cameras are a great feature for any home – but they don’t make for the most reassuring photos when trying to sell one.
8. No Giant Dogs Allowed
While most bad property listing photos are unintentional, this one was actually done on purpose, after photographer Daniel Achatz was asked to take the dog out of the interior photo – and Photoshopped the pet to be outside instead. Also, 10 times its original size. After deciding to put the photo on the listing anyway as a joke, it generated a spike in traffic due to being so silly.
Sometimes, perhaps bad property photos aren’t so bad after all.
What are your favourite terrible property listing photos you’ve seen on the web? Share your findings in the comments below!